contemporary issues

I'm tired of reading Guenther's book written by A.Speer explaining his part in a mad group of people in the 1930s.  So  I'm watching new You tube documentaries about the killing of Jews during death camp times. The Youtube documentary on IRMA GRESE (People Profiles Channel) shows a woman who became a nazi.  I've seen other documentaries on nazi higher up leaders which are based the reports of Jewish survivors of nazi death camps, HEART BREAKING.  SOBERING.

I wondered how male as well as females get turned into nazis. Seems parallel to how terrorists get trained.  A. Speer (in Guenther's book) turned out to be a liar about his part in killing Jews when checked against the facts of horrific activities he made possible.  The facts won out.  Thank you Youtube!. Facts please!

The documentary about Irma Grese seems to parallel contemporary situations in the world. Did our tax dollars once support killing Jews training schools & other Jew-killing organizations in countries much more east of us? Could terrorists be here in Canada too? In many Euro countries now? 

beforelcheckOnYouToday

Among my poems of life together I hold you close & breathe your fire THEN. learn your dreams you. 

Tell. Your feet are cold so. I put on warming socks & feel comfort. THEN.   when. 

You tell you need this or that I assemble what you need but fall asleep.  I have no idea whether you or I 

Are talking

But I believe. you.  anyways.  we.  have lies left between us.  & in spite. of strangers

You offer Love so.  do I buy you miracles to feed you fully?  O!  how life hurts as we grow tired!  this 

Too short long life in time yet.  yet yet

We freshen as if if we begin.  I : meaning me with you.   continues. so we dream as if help given.  by Strangers fixes things.  go.  figure.

How once upon a time.  & in Love.  we will .  we do.  continue.

keeping up spirits

 I made it my job to keep up my spirits. I decided to keep  a certain person's friends & associates informed of that person's struggles.  There are still some messenger replies that I can't access but then there's hope eventually I'll learn how Facebook works a bit better eventually. 

There's the added benefit of realizing what oneself considers really important. Meanwhile. A nearby neighbor helped by coming to the hospital & driving me home.  She plans on picking me up at he hospital after her work day Monday too. Feeling thankful.

homework for the next while

- On family estrangement:    Sibling Estrangement and Scapegoat Abuse (FSA): A Closer Look #scapegoat #familyestrangement

- Continue reading Guenther's book on Goebbels.

- Facts about slavery never mentioned in school | Thomas Sowell

Education continues.  Many thanks to many people.

what do terrorists fear?

I wonder what the terrorists fear so much.
Could it be:

Changing one’s mind?

Having to think for oneself & actually deciding how to make one’s own life happy?

Having to actually work at making themselves happy?

Giving up trying to dominate others who appear to be living better than them?

Figuring out how to make a life without hating one’s neighbors?

Having get along with intelligent women rather than dominate them or use them for sex?

Feeling empathy for one’s own people.

Feeling empathy for themselves?

Feeling empathy for people who think & make their lives different, better, more desirable?

Having to actually work at making themselves happy?

Having actually to be leaders in their own lives?

Taking risks rather than expecting others to pay for what they need & want?

Following rules of law that apply to kings as well as paupers?

Taking part in making sensible rules of law?
………..

I’m thinking maybe further current events world-wide will show a few more things that terrorists fear. 

I feel so sorry for people who seem so fearful.

LettingGoWithLove

There’s new energy in artmaking & tougher times with health issues. Everybody ends in the same place but I’m doing my best to be helpful to my mate & partner who’s going through some added grief.

Cookbooks we picked up in our travels have recipes for food Dave likes to eat. I made a lovely pasta sauce for the frozen mussels this morning. We enjoy meals based many areas of the world. I improvise to achieve flavors I remember.

Rome restaurants had sophisticated, expensive meals. My first tate of raw beef pounded thin & doused with olive oil & herbs felt like the moon & sun were spinning around my head. It cost us a week’s wages at the time but it was so worth it.

Smaller towns we explored in the countrysides of Italy & Greece had simple restaurants, sometimes only tables & chairs in someone’s garden. The cook would pick herbs & lettuces so the food we had cooked for us tasted really fresh.

These days my sweet companion & I like to reminisce travels as we “eat out of cookbooks.”

As I was cooking I also remembered people I felt attached to. As well I blessed some people & let them go with love. Now it’s time to wake up Dave.

...............................

SomeDaysAreHarderThanOthers

Some days are harder than others. You & I in recollection sift many happy moments through this fulsome. How? How brief seems like. We started yesterday.

Southern neighbors burn by carelessness. Makes for accountings worldwide & in par-tic-u-lar. Not only in English. We sort & parse. Micro & macro infidelities enuff excuses. Go. Go round & round.

You: blessed by heaven sent another. Spaceship. An execution. Maybe a rehearsal. Maybe routine: skyward journeys & safe landings. I stand agape. Don’t we wish?

Meantime news from new & ancient graveyards persist rage about. GodKnowsWhat. I would laugh if you were kinder than. Than your grousings ask. Just asking. How?

How does hate.  Turn. Otherwise?

HistoryLessons

We drove to St Joe yesterday to pick up another local history book just out in print. There’s more snow on the way so it was nice to get out of the house. Seems like ages since we traveled down the line, espec in winter as most winters we were away at Xmas. New eyes: it’s quite a rugged geography we live within. The old shed by one one of the gravel pits is gone at last. New businesses  have signs along the highway.  Old businesses are closed. As well we drive with ghosts too, what with reading local histories all these years. Glad we had so many years of attending events on the island in past years though. Islanders remind me of Dave’s relatives who are now dead & gone. It’s too bad Dave never really got to know all his relatives on St Joe but here & there among local histories the names of his family members going way back come up now & then.

It’s been hard finding time to work on my art stuff. This morning I manipulated the # 3 Jpeg from Anna until I am satisfied. Looks pretty good so far. I’ll test the colours with my printer before I finalize the colour aspect. I’ve started to think about how I want to use the series in a show. I have other works already finished that I would like to combine with these new works in a way that makes sense emotionally as well as cognitively. As usual current events, somewhat global rather than personal, as well as personal feelings & ideas are giving my head a work out about putting the show together. Keeping one’s head on straight can be a challenge. There’s always cooking, housework & times with Dave to help with keeping my head on straight.

Yesterday morning I made meatloaf

Yesterday morning I made meatloaf using my memory as a guide. I kept tasting & improvising until I got familiar tastes from my childhood. In my childhood I went to several different country schools in various places in Ontario. In those places people had events with communal dinners to raise funds to pay for building & upkeeping schools. They used their own hard earned monies so their children would learn reading & writing & some history I think, judging from the school books I was introduced to.

We had no books at home. My parents worked hard & gave us children food & shelter. My life seemed to begin when I went to school. I liked the people & kids I met when I went to school. I remember fondly the teachers & other adults who were helpful, kind, & taught me practical things like how to tell time. It was exciting to be part of school events where money was raised to keep schools going. The food we had at the communal dinners seemed strange yet tasty to me. Those were the days before government funding. Government funding happened by the time I moved to Prescott maybe, for certainly there the schools seemed really fancy.

When teaching in Algoma the kids I taught were the progeny of the hard working pioneers who’d made the first one room schools happen. I was glad I was teaching among the children of pioneers I respected. Eventually Dave & I travelled to places I’d read about in my schoolbooks long ago. Those books described the lives of children of the various counties of the British Empire. I still follow the news of those countries now & witness the changes we all had over the decades. These days new worlds are forming all over the globe.

Meanwhile the meatloaf turned out tasty & seems loaded with happy memories. Dave likes it too. Bonus!

9 years ago/ 2016/ back home/ update

back to the kitchen/2016

I'm waking up early & it's back to the kitchen as well as my various projects all smiling at me but I decided to attend to the veg because we shopped yesterday after we got home 

and there's no sense trying to keep veg fresh when roasting will also keep them handy for salads soup embellishments etc so trying roasting the veg with a light dressing of olive oil is 

new I hadn't thought of the oil touch this paranoia about oily stuff but then just a touch won't hurt as well I dressed the beet greens (also roasting those) with some rock salt which 

I pulverized figuring maybe that strong earthy taste might be modified a bit and then as per the new cookbook's instructions on waste not I used the parsnip peelings to add to the

takeout roast chicken bones and also some herbs from the freezer as well as a lime I found floating there so the soup stock will have some variations to my usual stock making 

but I'll hold my judgement until outcomes and there's Dave's opinions too in that will he eat it? later today maybe half the carrots can be processed for roasting as well as red 

peppers as per the cookbook's advice (book: An Everlasting Meal, Tamara Adler) which is to say sigh during the holidays I renewed my love of cooking as if it was lost in the 

first place but then we're a team on this and it would be nice to add some more veg to the diet as Dave is wonderful with his own specialties I feel fearful about opening up the 

laptop after the latest hissyfit it had in Toronto maybe the home vibes will encourage the computer enough to allow me to remove the few photos from the trip it didn't 

eat up there is surely something I'm not doing right with that machine to be continued...

had to cancel going to Waterloo to visit friends and was so very disappointed however Dave is sleeping a lot and looks a better and we did visit other Toronto friends during 

the layover and it was nice catching up with our Toronto friends' lives so now back to work

,,,,,,,,,

2024 update

Regarding the 2016 writing: back home from where? However that cook book I found at a place we’d stayed for a while. The last tenant left the cookbook behind so I took it & replaced it with another book I’d finished reading & had fun learning new ways to make healthy food while we probably looked through art galleries & museums,

Then I lent it to N. & lost track of it.  She never did use it but she liked the food when she came over for dinner sometimes.  Her death was a shock.  After she died her apt was such a state the apartment house called a disaster service to clean it out. Probably the book got thrown out with some of my art I gave her. Before she died she was refusing to let us in the door when we visited so we told her we would be gone & went on our trip. She said she was perfectly ok but she didn’t let us through the door. She was such a liar when she was flying high. I still can’t remember what year she died but I did find out who did the legal work afterwards & who has the ashes. I wanted to be friends. She had other friends but not me or Dave or her other siblings. Rest in peace N. You’re in a safe place. 

dream

I was visited by a German family in my bedroom. They had a look at the wall above my bed where I'd made some art with images & text. They whispered among themselves while looking at the work but the only word I could hear was "besucht."

Ich wurde von einer deutschen Familie in meinem Schlafzimmer besucht. Sie warfen einen Blick auf die Wand über meinem Bett, wo ich Kunst mit Bildern und Text gemacht hatte. Sie flüsterten miteinander, während sie das Werk betrachteten, aber das einzige Wort, das ich hören konnte, war „besucht.“

I wanted to be friends but the strangers turned away & kept whispering about “besucht.” I thought the word was something important. I only vaguely understood it, if at all, but it was my father’s word. I heard it when he was drunk or crying at the kitchen table.

Ich wollte mit mir befreundet sein, aber die Fremden wandten sich ab und flüsterten immer wieder von "besucht". Ich dachte, das Wort sei etwas Wichtiges. Ich verstand es, wenn überhaupt, nur vage, aber es war das Wort meines Vaters. Ich hörte es, wenn er betrunken war oder am Küchentisch weinte.

I knew when I heard that word I had to hide somewhere.
Thank you Google translate.